Failure of the insidious trap . . . turned into a triumph.
A Common Human Bond
When we experience failure, usually the first area that suffers is our conceptual picture of ourselves . . . our self image. We want our image to be positive and appealing, both to ourselves and to others. Failure casts doubts. It causes us to question whether we deserve respect, makes us feel less capable and confident, less useful, even less lovable . . . like being behind the eight ball.
All too often, we base our ability to give and receive love on the false assumption that we must earn it through our achievements. The great insidious trap of failure is that, we are inclined to reject love . . . both the love of others and, very importantly, self-love. In fact, failure and self-hatred are ugly and dangerous allies. They make us want to turn against ourselves, even punish ourselves. The ultimate expression of anger and hatred that can be generated by such self-conceived failure is suicide.
We must learn how to constructively handle failure in our own lives (even help others learn as well).Today, we hear a precise and clear command: "Owe no one anything, except to love one another; for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law." Sometimes we learn that we have been about the wrong things entirely in life. AND there is no such thing as failure as long as we learn something from it.
As a French essayist (not me) wrote, There are some defeats more triumphant than victories. If you do not like or believe a frenchman, try John Keats. He wrote, I was never afraid of failure; for I would sooner fail than not be among the greatest. There is no escaping the fact that we all fail. Failure is the great equalizer, whether rich or poor, young or old (they say they do it less). It is something we virtually do all our lives. It does in fact provide we human beings with a common bond.
Join the humans (and varying failures) of the world; the wealthy, writers, bank presidents, movie stars, school teachers, scientists, ball players, and entertainers everywhere.
Join others humans who have failed their share as well. Join us at St. Alphonsus Rodriquez. Join us at masses and at annual picnics, the sacraments, summer festival, matrimony, family softball, education classes, special dinners, ball games, baptism, picnics, holy communion, prayers, singing, music, etc.
In Frenchie's words, "If you fail to love and forgive, you have truly failed."
This page is dated January 1999